The Sure-Fire Way to be Sure You Will Win
REAL TALK: have you ever noticed that the people who usually make it in life are the ones who are SURE they will?
There’s a certain power that comes with being sure. Nothing ruffles your feathers. Something may pull at you, but it doesn’t pull you away from your purpose. You just know that you know that you know that you’re going to make it. Do you have that yet?
That assuredness that you’re going to make it no matter what - you need to find it! You owe it to yourself to find it.
For me, there’s one aspect of my game that helped that confidence sink in for me, helped me really root it in my heartular region. There was one thing that made it more than just me blurting out “I’M GOING TO MAKE IT” at the top of my lungs. Something that made me making it more than just an idea, but something I actually owned. And I want to share that with you today.
Once upon a time, I heard a very powerful statement: “You are the architect of your future with your words.” I’ll admit, the first time I heard that, it seemed a little out there. But then all around me I saw people using the power of the spoken word...and I saw their lives change.
So I tried it. And you know what? It worked. I highly recommend it.
“Oh, you’re just gonna say good stuff and good stuff will happen? What a joke.”
Well, how’s your current strategy working for ya there, champ? You keep talking about the things you have, and it keeps getting worse.
If you actually embraced the fact that your words are powerful, then you could start using them as TOOLS to accelerate your life. You could use them as tools to become more awesome, to become stronger, to become more of the person you know you could be.
Have you embraced it yet? Great! Let me give you some specifics about how you can actually get the power of words into your life in a PRODUCTIVE way. They’re already working in your life, so let’s make them work FOR you.
First, you need to understand that your words are programming how you think and how you see the world. Let me ask you a question: let’s say you’re at a grocery store, and you overhear a parent talking to their kid. You hear them say, "Man, you can't do anything right, kid. What’s wrong with you? You’re so dumb sometimes."... How does that make you feel? Does your heart break for that kid? Are you angry at that parent? If you have a soul, you’d probably be very upset about that situation.
The problem is, we talk to ourselves like that all the time.
You are constantly reminding yourself of the things you didn’t do right, the areas that you failed in, the mistakes that you made. You talk to yourself that way ALL THE TIME. Why aren’t you outraged by it?
You have to understand that your words are SEEDS. They’re seeds that stay with you, and they grow over time. I’m sure you have a story that you remember from your childhood, either about your brother calling you names, your friends making fun of you, or your mom getting frustrated at you. But no matter the situation, they said words that cut you, and they cut you HARD. And even if they apologized, you still remember it, clear as day. I have those stories too. To me, that is cold, hard proof that words stay with you. They stay with you, and they grow. Plain and simple.
So you have to take responsibility for the words you’re saying about your future. If you want a successful life, you CAN’T keep planting poison with your words. You NEED to figure out how to plant the right kind of seeds.
As you’re thinking about the words that you’re saying, I have 3 types of words that I think will help you, 3 categories if you will:
1. Your words should be INTENTIONAL
If you take a second to really listen to what you’re saying, there are a lot of words that come out of your mouth because either your parents said it, you grew up saying it, or your current association says it all the time. But it’s important to actually THINK about the words you’re saying and decide if it’s actually what you want to say.
For example, when my kids are crazy and loud in public, I’ve had to be very intentional about what I say. As I’m talking to them, I’m telling them about how they should be considerate of the people around them. But when I’m talking to other people, I NEVER apologize for my kids being kids. I never say “Sorry about my kids”, I say “Thank you for being patient with my kids.” Why don’t I apologize for my kids? Because I’m not sorry for them, my kids are awesome. And I don’t want to program myself to think my kids are something I should be sorry for.
Speaking of my 4 year old, he likes to jump. A lot. On and off of everything. Lately he’s been climbing onto the columns in our basement and jumping off of them onto the couch. But I never tell him to be careful, you want to know why? Because I don’t want him living in fear. You know what I say instead? “Pay attention”, “Make sure you look when you’re jumping”, “Think before you do stuff!” - I make sure he’s safe, because I’m his dad, but I’m intentional about the lessons I’m building into him. Because those words are seeds, and they will grow in him too.
You can create feelings and perspectives that you don’t want, in both yourself and others, if you’re not INTENTIONAL with your words.
2. Your words should be EMPOWERING.
This visual was very helpful for me, because it really made me think about how I talk to people: Imagine that someone has a keyboard on their chest, and it’s wired straight into their brain. If you wouldn’t type something into that keyboard and permanently store it into their brain, don’t say it. If you wouldn’t type it straight into their brain, DON’T say it.
Us guys sometimes have that macho ego to think we’re right all the time. And if we’re right, you’re wrong. But if you type “you’re wrong” into your girl’s brain for over a decade, you end up with a girl who thinks she’s wrong about everything. She doubts herself all the time, and now a girl that used to be awesome is a shell of the woman she was supposed to be. You created that.
And gals, you're not off the hook. Turn on any TV program, and the gal is the one who’s got it together while the guy is some bumbling idiot that’s along for the ride. If you talk to your husband like he’s a lazy couch potato or a bumbling idiot, don’t be surprised when that’s exactly what he turns into 10 years from now.
Most of the world spends zero time caring about how uplifting their words are, so it’s important for us to be EMPOWERING with our words.
3. Your words should be BRAVE.
There’s this old story from the Bible: the Israelites have arrived just outside the promised land, and they send 12 spies in to go check it out. 10 of them come back with a rough report: there are giants in the land, and we are like grasshoppers compared to them. We have no chance! But the other 2 come back excited about the fruit of the land. They’re excited about finally getting to the land they were promised! Sure, the people of the land are huge, but the land is supposed to be ours! We’re here! Let’s go!
I always found it funny that no one knows the names of the 10 spies. They have a bunch of random names that don’t get used any more. But you hear the names Joshua and Caleb a lot.
Because history has a way of erasing the doubters. Only the BRAVE create legacies.
And bravery isn’t only what you do. Often what you do follows what you believe, and what you believe follows… you guessed it - your WORDS. So make sure your words are BRAVE.
Speaking good words is not about ignoring the facts. It’s not denying reality or pretending a problem doesn’t exist. Speaking good words is just denying that the facts are the final word. The facts may be true, but they are NOT the final word. The facts don't get any more due than they deserve, because for me and my family, the DREAM is the final word.
And when the dream is the final word, you can be SURE that you will get there. Assuredness will come when you speak INTENTIONAL, EMPOWERING, BRAVE words.